Kurrent Events

I'm really getting tired of the disrespect President Obama has been receiving. It's one thing for gun-toting inbred hicks to throw some hate, but a congressman? Bush would never receive such rudeness. Perhaps because Dems will talk about you, but mostly behind your back via liberal media. Trash talking is going to happen but don't be tacky about it. "You lie"? That's not even a complete sentence. As Thembi put it, the correct phrasing is, "You A lie." Moron.

Drug abuse/addiction has been in the headlines lately. DJ AM's relapse and subsequent overdose and then the awful video of Maia Campbell making the rounds on the internets have made addiction a definite water cooler topic. I've always been a fan of A&E's "Intervention" and other drug related documentaries ("Cocaine Nation" on the Discovery channel is really good). I started to think about why some people are prone to addiction/abuse and some aren't. Then I thought of what was taught in school. Remember, "D.A.R.E."? I didn't learn much in those classes - except when the police officer brought in replicas of street drugs and we got to look at them. I doubt the program had a huge effect on me. But you know what did? Movies. I had a full year of nightmares after watching Chris Tucker overdose in "Dead Presidents." Tack on another two years of nightmares after watching Chris Rock get cracked out in New Jack City. That scared me the hell straight. That's what kids should be watching in health class. Bump "Breakfast Club." (I love the movie but I really didn't see the point of watching it as a 15 year old in health class and then being asked which character I identified with. My teacher was not amused with my response: "No one.")

In kidnapping news...I'm still in shock over the recovery of Jaycee Dugard. What a nightmare. She's jacked for life, as are the kids she had with her kidnapper. I'm most in shock that the kidnapper has plead not guilty. Dude, what the eff. It's a wrap.

With the recent news that those weirdos the Duggards are now on baby 19, I may have to co-sign a limit on the number of babies a woman can birth. I mean really. 19? And now that those nitwits the Gosselin's and the Octo-mom have made having a litter of children profitable, I really may co-sign a baby making limit. In fact, I think Jaycee Dugard's mother should be able to pick out a Duggard kid and get to raise one as a way to make up for the lost time due to Jaycee's kidnapping.

Speaking of stealing kids, I may steal from a kid. The swine flu vaccine is going to be made available free to new york city public school kids. I may have to pop into PS 11 and swipe a shot real quick. It's funny, I didn't really take the risk of the flu seriously until Rachel Maddow admitted on the Jimmy Fallon show that she had it. I figure if a smart, hygienic (she looks like she carries hand sanitizer in her murse), person like Rachel can get it, I can.

In TV news...Tyra, I'm so through with you. Wig, weave, "natural," jheri, just shut it and host top model. Thanks. Entourage has been predictable and boring. I still don't get the whole vampire thing - True Blood and those Twilight flicks...um, yeah, I don't really eff with vampires except around Halloween. But enjoy. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia finally premieres next week. It's about damn time.

In sporting news...I think because I'm now a resident of one of the most football obsessed cities in the country, I'm really into football this year. NFL, College, even fantasy. I even started to learn the player's names. Can't wait to watch the Steelers, Eagles (mmm Michael Vick), and of course my beloved Trojans.

Late add (9/14): The VMAs. First off, they still have that show? I thought it was cancelled. Or maybe I just have ignored it the past few years. I've never viewed a VMA telecast in one sitting. I'll catch a snippet here and there during the gazillion replays. I caught Kanye's tackiness, Beyonce's graciousness, and a chubb rock Janet Jackson paying tribute to her bro. Um, is it just me or were her moves not as crisp as usual? I think with her added weight her dance moves just aren't as tight as when she has the 6 pack. And is it just me or was it kind of shady to release a single after the show? Cashing in on her bro's dedication...how very Joe Jackson of her.

Ellen is going to be on Idol. I haven't watched the show since the large black man beat out the weird looking white fellow, so I really don't care.

Tyler Perry has caused much melee by allegedly being interested in Beyonce to star in his film adaptation of "For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf". Bey, please don't make me turn on you. I am a huge fan but please, please don't ruin this important piece. Keep making exercise class soundtracks and crappy clothes. I beg you.

Smooches,

KB

The Real Me

While tying my shoes for the third time at the gym the other day, I started to think about quirky little things about me that no one knows about. It got me thinking about my friends and what little oddities they keep hidden from the world. I found out that one friend has an unusual reaction when she goes to yoga class...a very sensual reaction if you know what I mean! Yowza.

In typical KB fashion, I've compiled a list of things you may not know about me:

1. I never learned how to tie my shoes. For whatever reason, I was never formally taught how to tie my laces. As a young lass, I would look over at my brother when he tied his and tried to copy his method. I don't think I copied it correctly because around the age of 12 a friend noticed how I tied my shoes and commented about my process. She said she had never seen anyone tie their shoes like I did. I shrugged it off and kept it moving. I mean, my laces were tied so who cares about the process? Like a hot dog factory, you're only concerned with the end result, don't worry about how the final product was made. However, recently I've noticed that I have to re-tie my shoes more often than I assume I should. In this day of you-tube, I may have to check out a video on proper shoe tying, and finally learn how to tie my shoes. And yes, I'm knocking on 30 years of age.

2. When I look up the customer service contact numbers for various services (utilities, etc.), I'm often tempted to call the hearing impaired number just to see what happens. I know, I'm completely going to hell for even thinking about this. I've never called but boy am I tempted.

3. I never liked peanut butter growing up until I found out, as a teen, that it was extremely high in fat. After finding out its fat content and the need to limit one's intake, I was hooked on the stuff. Do yourself a favor and check out Smucker's crustless PB&J sammiches in the frozen food section of the grocery store. Yum.

4. I'm extremely flexible. My arms can stretch back farther than most, often eliciting a shriek from bystanders when I stretch, lift a barbell, or during yoga class. The flexibility of course came in handy as a javelin thrower in college. And also when I need to grab something behind me and I don't feel like turning around.

5. I probably shouldn't tell you this since someone out there may use this against me as a torture technique, but what the hell. I'm extremely - extremely - ticklish. How ticklish you ask? During a pedicure I once kicked the lady in the chin while she massaged my foot. I have to hold onto the chair for dear life when she's scrubbing the bottom of my feet. Also, when most people cry and scream in pain during a bikini wax, I laugh like crazy. It does hurt but I'm so sensitive and ticklish just a touch on my thigh will send me into a giggle fit. Don't judge me, I'm not a sado-masochist. I swear! My mom said she was really ticklish growing up but lost it when she was around 30. So I've got a couple more years of the inappropriate bursts of laughter.

6. I'm slightly obsessed with numbers. I don't want to go really into it in this public setting, but let's just say I don't really celebrate the new year at 12:00am. I raise my glass at 12:34...and 56 seconds. And if I happen to glance at a clock and it happens to be 12:34, I grin from ear to ear and make a wish. The key is that you can't stare at the time until it turns to 12:34, you have to catch it. I've been doing this since I first learned to tell time. Also, I've felt very lucky to live in an era with so many great date sequences: 7/7/07, 6/7/08, 5/7/09, etc. Go ahead and make fun. It's my thing.

7. I had to add another item, to make the list a solid 7 (my favorite number). Can't end at 6, that's just not right. (See above.)

Your turn. What are some things about you that no one knows about?

Smooches,

KelleBelle