Jokes.
But in real news, a post on Essence.com brought up an old idea that W.E.B. Dubois first brought up in 1903. Basically the notion that successful, educated people (black women in particular) should procreate more. You can infer why.
Here's a snippet of the post:
A curious idea was posed to me, and by extension, all Black women like me. A
woman, Dominique (not her real name), suggested that it was my duty as an
educated, sensible African-American woman to get married and procreate.
DUH!
I mean hello, who doesn't want to re-create the Obamas, the Huxtables, or the Winslow clan on Family Matters (save for Judy...yikes)?
My problem is the idea that we are obligated to reproduce. I think (as does Dorothy, who makes some great points in her comment to this post) the obligation should be to support our community, and not necessarily to get knocked up right this minute. I'd love to reproduce but since that isn't happening nan time soon I will support the children that are in existence right now.
Also, there is no guarantee that successful, educated parents will raise successful, educated children. And just because someone is not educated does not mean they will fail as a parent. Not at all.
However, I couldn't help but think about a recent conversation my mother and I had. She is with our family in North Carolina and Philly this week and of course she gave me the latest family drama report. One cousin is at the age of 37 a mother of 5 (I'm not going to say how many fathers, but it's more than one), grandmother of 3, and has never held a steady job. Which isn't surprising - she has been quite busy with all them kids, and TLC ain't handing out reality shows in the 'hood. Another cousin, who as a senior in high school, just had his second child...with a different girl than the mother of his first child, born earlier this year.
Meanwhile, my mother is grandchildless and her children are arguably the most successful of the bunch.
What in the ef.
My question is, if it's my "duty" to procreate and create a more well-rounded African-American community...does that mean I have to get knocked up by a black man? Have ya seen the statistics? What about a halfer like me? Or a very tan Mediterranean man? I can't give any guarantees, but I'll try my best. In the meantime, I'll stick to being a positive role model to young sisters and brothers (of any race) and breaking stereotypes along the way.
Smooches,
KB
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1 comment:
Yeah its kind of a problem. Though poor parents don't necessarily equal bad parents and neither necessarily results in unsuccessful children. And wealthy parents aren't necessarily good parents and I definitely know that their kids end up way screwed up and they only get away with failing out of school, doing drugs, and committing petty crimes because they are white/have money/and are not stalked by the criminal justice system the way poor and brown children are. That said, I do believe we have a responsibility, if you care about the black community, to contribute to the black community, not necessarily by having kids, but by supporting kids. I think people generally become very selfish and focused on their own needs the more money, status, and education they acquire. I just don't think its something that Black people can afford to do. We are riding high on the sacrifices of brown folks before us yet conveniently catch a case of amnesia and turn our backs on the plight of those less fortunate. Race shouldn't matter but hard to say it doesn't when the number of people poor, incarcerated, and all manner of category of suffering are disproportionately brown folks.
Sorry I just read a depressing report on poverty in the US!
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