I just ate two green olives and immediately began craving a dirty martini. And I don't even do martinis like that. Y'all know KB's drink is the skinny girl margarita (tequila, ice, and fresh lime juice) or vodka and diet tonic. Now I'm thirsty. Thanks.
Meanwhile, I saw my doctor yesterday for a normal check-up and when I responded to her alcohol consumption inquiry she went on for approximately 10 minutes about how much she drank in med school.
Apparently, every 6 weeks was "Black Monday" where her class would be tested all day on the previous 6 week's worth of material. Naturally, the bar was the first stop after the examination ended. Doctor Feel Good went on and on about how hungover her and her classmates would be the Tuesday after "Black Monday" and the cycle would begin all over again. I appreciated her attempt to bond with me, as I told her I drink on occassion (2x a week if I'm lucky!) but not as often as I did in law school, when there were ample opportunities to drink in celebration of completing some academic feat.
I was a tad concerned by the sparkle in her eye as she waxed nostalgic about how much drinking she did in her med school days. P.s. - she was a nurse prior to becoming a doctor so med school wasn't that long ago (she's in her 40s). The sparkle, combined with her attitude of, "hey, when you're stressed with that much work, you're gonna use alcohol to cope," slightly bothered me.
But not as much as her Rx game.
Son, this chick whips out the prescription pad at the drop of a dime. I went in for a check-up and came out with 4 prescriptions. What? I mean yeah, my muscles get a tad sore if I hit the gym a bit much but do I really need horse-sized ibuprofen pills to ease the pain? This broad was damn near finished writing a prescription before I even opened my mouth to tell her about a small burn on my chest (curling iron - don't ask). Next thing I know, I have a shiny new bottle of super strength anti-inflammatory cream. Did I mention there's a pharmacy in the same medical building? On my way out to the parking lot I looked like I was leaving the mall after a shopping spree.
Apparently, every 6 weeks was "Black Monday" where her class would be tested all day on the previous 6 week's worth of material. Naturally, the bar was the first stop after the examination ended. Doctor Feel Good went on and on about how hungover her and her classmates would be the Tuesday after "Black Monday" and the cycle would begin all over again. I appreciated her attempt to bond with me, as I told her I drink on occassion (2x a week if I'm lucky!) but not as often as I did in law school, when there were ample opportunities to drink in celebration of completing some academic feat.
I was a tad concerned by the sparkle in her eye as she waxed nostalgic about how much drinking she did in her med school days. P.s. - she was a nurse prior to becoming a doctor so med school wasn't that long ago (she's in her 40s). The sparkle, combined with her attitude of, "hey, when you're stressed with that much work, you're gonna use alcohol to cope," slightly bothered me.
But not as much as her Rx game.
Son, this chick whips out the prescription pad at the drop of a dime. I went in for a check-up and came out with 4 prescriptions. What? I mean yeah, my muscles get a tad sore if I hit the gym a bit much but do I really need horse-sized ibuprofen pills to ease the pain? This broad was damn near finished writing a prescription before I even opened my mouth to tell her about a small burn on my chest (curling iron - don't ask). Next thing I know, I have a shiny new bottle of super strength anti-inflammatory cream. Did I mention there's a pharmacy in the same medical building? On my way out to the parking lot I looked like I was leaving the mall after a shopping spree.
Alright yall, I'm off to down a couple of pain pills and wash it down with a crisp martini. Delish.
Smooches!
KB
Bonus point opportunity: what artist has an album that shares the title of this post? Winner gets some of my meds!
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1 comment:
coltrane.
send the painkillers fedex, pls.
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